On holding too much, releasing it, and learning to breathe again
Some days your mind isn’t cluttered because life is overwhelming. It’s cluttered because everything is floating around in your head at the same time.
Work tasks. Things you can’t forget. Kids’ schedules. Dinner. Finding time to work out. Finding time with the kids. Their after-school routine. Everything.
Your brain starts juggling, and before you know it, you feel like you’re holding 47 tabs open all at once.
I know because I’ve been there.
The Night I Couldn’t Name It
After the twins were born, my brain felt exactly like that. 47 tabs open, and I couldn’t close any of them.
One night, my husband asked me what was wrong.
And I couldn’t answer. Not because I didn’t want to tell him. I literally couldn’t name what was taking up space in my head. It was like a roulette wheel flipping in my mind, spinning between work and kids and dinner and everything I was trying to fit in, and I couldn’t identify what the main priority was.
I just froze.
So I grabbed a notebook and started writing. Not a to-do list. Not a journal entry. Just… everything that was in my head.
Two minutes later, I could breathe again. And when I say breathe again, I don’t mean figuratively. I mean literally.
Yes, you read that right. I would find myself in the middle of the day in meetings or writing emails not breathing. Just holding my breath without even realizing it. And this moment is what made me aware of it, as I took a deep exhale.
I was shocked by how much I’d written down in just two minutes. I didn’t realize how much my mind was actually spinning and holding on to until I saw it on the page.
But here’s what really happened: when I put it down, I could finally breathe. I didn’t have to hold it anymore.
What Changed in My Body
In addition to holding my breath, it was my dentist who pointed it out to me.
After I moved and started my new job, she noticed I was grinding my teeth. Locking my jaw. Holding tension I didn’t even realize was there.
She shared that in the D.M.V area it’s very common. I think she noticed the look of concern on my face and was hoping to ease my shock. Because honestly, I had never locked my jaw or ground my teeth before. This was all new.
That’s when I became aware that my holding of my breath was a stress response.
Writing it all down allowed my body to relax in a way I could feel immediately. My shoulders dropped. My jaw unclenched. I could actually exhale.
The relief lasts until I need the practice again. But the real challenge for me was learning to act early. To recognize when I’m starting to feel anxious or confused or spacey. To do the mind sweep before I get to the point where I feel like I’m about to explode.
In the past, I thought my only option was to push through. But as I’ve matured, I’ve learned that I can ask for help. I can use a tool. I can literally write it down and feel the difference in my body.
The 2-Minute Mind Sweep
Here’s what I do:
Set a timer for two minutes (or don’t use a timer at all if having a timer triggers you or causes anxiety or stress). Write down everything on your mind, without organizing it, judging it, or fixing it.
Just write.
That’s it.
No structure. No pressure. No rules. No trying to solve anything or create action steps.
Think of it as clearing off the kitchen counter of your mind. You’re not organizing the items yet. You’re just getting them out of your head so your brain can stop holding them.
After the two minutes, depending on where you are and the time you have, you can start to organize the list. Break it into to-do lists, reminders, and thoughts. Process through what needs to happen next.
Or you don’t have to. If you don’t have time in that moment, that’s fine. Save the list and come back to it when you can. At your pace. No rush.
The point isn’t to solve everything right then. The point is to get it out of your head so your brain can stop carrying it.
Why It Works
Your brain is incredible. It stores the memories that shape your life, but the mental space it uses to keep up
with today’s tasks is surprisingly limited. When you try to hold every appointment, deadline, conversation,
worry, and to-do list in your head, your brain keeps replaying them so you won’t forget. “Don’t forget to send
that email.” “Pick up the groceries.” “Call your mom.”
That constant mental replay doesn’t just clutter your thoughts—it affects your body. Your nervous system
stays on alert. Your thoughts become scattered. Your jaw tightens. Your shoulders creep toward your ears. You
catch yourself holding your breath without even realizing it. Suddenly, your day feels heavier than it really is.
But the moment you write those thoughts down, something changes. Your brain no longer has to keep
rehearsing them. It can stop reminding you every few minutes because it knows the information is safe. Your
mind becomes quieter. Thinking feels lighter. Your shoulders soften. You take a deeper breath. And instead of
spending your energy trying to remember everything, you can finally use it to move forward.
How I Use It Now
It’s become a tool I always have with me. In my notebook. In my notes app on my phone. On paper at my desk.
I use it when I start to feel like I’m holding too much. When I’m anxious or confused or spacey. When I know I need to act early instead of waiting until I’m about to break.
And the best part? It doesn’t have to be another thing on your to-do list. It doesn’t cost anything. It takes two minutes.
It’s just a way to clear mental space. To get the things out of your head so your brain can stop carrying them.
Mirror Moment
What are you holding in your mind right now that you don’t have to?
What would feel different in your body if you put it on paper?
One Action for This Week
Do a 2-minute mind sweep right now. Or before bed tonight.
Let the page hold what your mind no longer needs to.
Your best today is already building your best tomorrow.
A Gentle Note from Keisha
Keisha’s House is a space for reflection, rest, and gentle recovery. While I hold a BSW and MSW, this content is not therapy or clinical treatment.
If what you’re carrying feels heavier than reflection can hold, you might find support in guided tools like Headspace meditation, breathwork, and mindfulness designed to help with stress, sleep, and emotional regulation. Explore it here.
Disclosure: This is an affiliate link. I may earn a small commission at no cost to you. I only share resources I genuinely believe in.
You’re always welcome here. Take your time, explore what resonates, and come back whenever you need to breathe.
